In her memoir Mean Baby to be released on May 17, the actress talks about her past between alcoholism and abuse. “Being a mother changed everything.” She had a lifetime of alcohol addiction: she was drunk for the first time at the age of 7, an “expert alcoholic” as a child, and in college the rapes she suffered when she was too drunk to be able to say no.
It’s the touching story that Selma Blair, the 49-year-old actress who announced she has multiple sclerosis four years ago, makes of her life in her memoir Mean Baby, out May 17.
Selma Blair drunk at 7 years old
In the book, some passages of which were anticipated by the weekly People, Blair describes the first intoxication as a “revelation“. And she tells how initially the effects of her alcohol seemed to her “the warmth of God” that filled her. The actress recalls that it was Passover, a holiday during which wine plays an important part in the ceremonial dinner. From an early age her family members had given her a few sips of Manischewitz wine (a brand of American kosher wine, ed). But that year, when she was 7, she got carried away. And since no one was paying attention to my level of consumption, ”she drank enough wine to be more than sparkling.
She then she started drinking regularly
“That night – reveals the actress – I got drunk. Very drunk. Eventually, I was put in bed with my sister Katie. In the morning I didn’t remember how I got there ». From that time on she started drinking regularly. Not to get drunk, just “a quick sip every time my anxiety grew.” Enough to make it a little lighter.
An expert alcoholic
Sip after sip, however, “I have become an expert alcoholic, skilled in hiding my secret”. Which has remained so for all elementary schools, middle schools and high schools. “I don’t know if I could have survived my childhood without alcoholism – says the actress made famous by her role in Cruel Intentions -. And that is why it is such a problem for so many people: because in the beginning it is really a great comfort, a huge relief “.
Abuse in college
But as her life went on, that relief became more and more of a problem. In fact, in college, her alcohol abuse got worse, and she made her vulnerable to sexual predators. Once, she tells her, after a day of drinking she was raped by at least one man. “I don’t know if they both raped me. One of them certainly did. I made myself small and silent, and I waited for it to end. I wish I could say that what happened to me that night was an anomaly, but it wasn’t. “
Because «only that time it was a violent act», but several other times the same happened but she was «too drunk to fend off the rapists. Each time I came out calm and full of shame ». And then, going on, “I drank to forget these things. I didn’t drink to attract attention, I drank to disappear “. While drinking, memories “can be buried”, but shame “you always keep it inside”.
Being a mother changed everything
Then, in 2016, the actress says he hit her rock bottom: she was so drunk that she fainted on the plane in front of her 4-year-old son while they were returning from Cancun to Los Angeles together. During her flight, the actress began to cry, and to complain about a man who was abusing her. She then fainted, and she was rescued on landing, carried away on a stretcher from the plane. “The thing that really made me stop drinking was the knowledge that I could have died on that plane. Being a mother changed everything. “ Since then, since 2016, Selma Blair has remained sober, and she has worked on her trauma with a therapist, giving up alcohol forever.
Author: Michael Zippo
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